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Submitted on
January 25
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The last peice of my shattered heart falls
Crumbling in the hands of yet another
The dark empty hole
That was my heart
I feel it growing
Feeding on anger
And hatered
And pain
Every hope crushed into a thousand peices
Torn apart, I stand here bleeding
From my heart, ripped open, unbeating
The scent of blood fills the air
Snapped i have finally
My body now is as i feel
Dead
Woo poems :iconslendydanceplz:
I own everything ouo
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:iconbrokendemise:
BrokenDemise Featured By Owner Mar 9, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
G-W FEEDBACK:

1) Wow! That's what my first thought is: wow! I love the word choices you made for this.
2) I would say a little more punctuation here and there to help with the flow a little (commas and semi colons). The lower-case thing where it continues the "sentences" might help some too. Also, fix "peice" so that it is "piece."
3) ex: "The last piece of my shattered heart falls,
            crumbling in the hands of yet another;
            The dark empty hole
            that was my heart"
4) So, my overall comment is basically the same as the first word I used in the feedback format: Wow! :wow:
5) Rating: 5.0
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:iconyaoi4eva666:
yaoi4eva666 Featured By Owner Mar 9, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks ; v ;
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:iconrumor-the-mirage:
Rumor-the-Mirage Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I love your style!!! :) You're poems are amazing!!
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:iconyaoi4eva666:
yaoi4eva666 Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks <3
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:iconminia4:
Minia4 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I love that!
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:iconyaoi4eva666:
yaoi4eva666 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanksies so much <3
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:iconminia4:
Minia4 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
My pleasure Kao Emoji-88 (Feeling loved) [V5] 
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:iconyaoi4eva666:
yaoi4eva666 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Heart - Free Heart Love 
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:iconminia4:
Minia4 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:rose4you: by spongee0990  
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:iconyaoi4eva666:
yaoi4eva666 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Matching icons 
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